Obnoxious Beer Snobs Overheard Describing Beer as "Jelly Forward"
DULUTH, MN—Sources from yesterday's All Pints North festival say they heard a small group of obnoxious beer snobs being really annoying when describing their beer. Quincy Jeffs, a 32-year-old software developer, told reporters "They were standing in front of me taking selfies when I heard someone say 'jelly forward', I couldn't believe it." The local festival was attended by over 500 people, most of whom seem to have crossed paths with the group.
"I was standing next to them in line and they were so obnoxious, saying words I've never heard before like drupaceous and attenuated. I heard them talk about that jelly beer too, they wouldn't shut up about it," said first time festival-goer Amanda Booker. Though not confirmed, the beer in question is reported to have been the Double Jelly Vibes Pastry Sour from Dangerous Man Brewing Company.